lol today was an off day. not with eating or anything. just with the fact I'm lonely when it comes to love. i was telling my dad last night that i hooked up Trisha and Brock...two of my good friends, and Brenna and Thomas..two of my other good friends and NOW there always double dating and i feel like a tag along and my dad is like are you going to date Brian and I'm like no I'm hooking him up with Shawna...then my dad said" oh...why don't any of these guys like you?"

 

 

um good question cause I'm fat..then i felt like crap the whole day and today. i just sat alone today and I'm planning to just hang out with my other friends today which will piss off Trisha and Brenna but really I'm feeling ugly and lonely and i miss brad. who obviously wants nothing to do with me. our plans always get fucked up. so I'm moving on...who cares right.

 

oh and another thing that really sucks is the fact that I eat 150 calz yesterday...today I'm not even hungry..i feel week...

 

I'm falling for my friend Ian who is already in a relationship. i thought if i met her I'd like her as a friend and then I'd stop liking Ian. which almost worked cause she was awesome. but i still like him , so today were spending lunch together and I'm going to tell him i can't hang out with him anymore. one thing I'm not is a bitch. i believe that you should never go for someone Else's boyfriend....its just wrong. i won't sink that low and in the end I'd just get hurt anyway..though I'm hurting now...oh the irony.

 

so that was in the morning..i wrote that

so now i waited at my locker for about 15 minutes...he didn't show up instead my pal ( hotie..Jacob hogart lookalike...but way more fit and without the lip ring) his name is tyler. well he comes along and sits with me asking me about what I'm doing this weekend and if I'm coming outside for a smoke. he has this huge Delicious looking hamburger and he's eating away with it. he offers to buy me one and won't leave me alone until i take a bite of his. so its just a bite right...wrong...well whats that like 40 calz.

 

I just got home and i get a message from Ian on facebook:

 

 

well thin is best and I'll achieve it

skinny will win

i will win

close to perfect

think thin girls

i believe in you.