ON FRIDAY MAY 9TH 2008

well i got up this morning and i was 98 pounds...woot..yes..now I'm back to what i was in September. now I'm going out tonight with Brock and Trisha and other friends to his house. i wasn't going to go but then Brock and Trisha told me that they called Travis to come but he said no; until they told him i was going to be there and he said I'll come then.

 

yes, i had a crush on him before and i was the last one he spoke to before he got suspended for skipping and smoking pot. so yep he's a winner. hes cute though...

 

OK so I'm suppose to spend my lunch with Ian I've nervous though...i still haven't decided if i was going to tell him we can't be friend or if i was...grrrrrrrr..i'm so indecisive. i like him so much...but Nichole..shes so sweet and she wants to be friends with me...this is so hard...this hole situation reminds me of that song from Taylor swift...tear drops on my guitar...shes so skinny but shes got n average face...I'm prettier but i can't cause problems when there moving in-together...so i could just be the friend and never let him know i have feelings for him or i could just stop hanging around with him . we do everything at school together..he comes to my house to eat and watch movies...this is going to hurt so much..I'll be losing a best friend and a crush in the end if i do this but i with not be a home wrecker...i wouldn't want that if it was me.

 

so I'll just concentrate on other guys and perhaps I'll get over him. I'm not in love so i think i can do this.

 

well i won't be eating tonight and I'll be walking a lot tonight...hopefully i don't get bruised up like last weekend.

 

think thin cause if you don't no one is going to make you skinny.

 

chrisa   

 

AFTERNOON

 

OK so Ian doesn't show up...so i leave and he comes out side to the smoking section...ware he never comes sits alone with me and we talk to hole lunch period...i chickened out so now i know i'm going to have to just befriends..shitty

 

then after school i went to Brock's..mom got pi-st owell...ended up eating..Travis showed up with loser brother...then smoked us up and talked to me then left to go to hooters...haha hes sticking his head out the window shooting hooters the hole time... haha his brother is so shy around me...couldn't even look at me...he must know how much i don't like him. Travis is suck a hypocrite...he tells me how much he hates his brother and how hes a fat fucker and how he wishes he dies then he ditches us to use his brother for 8 grams of dope and a night to hooter but come to think of it i would use him to...haha

 

OK met this boy bobby..kind of cute...feel for my seductive ways..won't stop talking about me to Trisha and now he keeps texting me and saying good night....grrrrrrrrrrr....

 

i was so ashamed to sun tan today but i still did and the gawking of my guy friends began....lol i have to many guy friends...

 

xoxo

chrisa